Wednesday, September 12, 2012

I Sure Am Glad the NFL is Back

I've mentioned here before that at one time I was an NFL season ticket holder. So why did I give it up? Well, it was a combination of the skyrocketing ticket costs, the league's increasingly mediocre level of play, the media hype that has reached insane levels, the seemingly endless displays of superficial patriotism and the advertisements that bombard you continuously from the moment you set foot in the stadium...oh, and also so I don't have to ever again be in physical proximity to clueless idiots like the people who appear in the video above from opening weekend. Seriously, what a fucking freak show.

You want to know why America is going down the shitter? It's because people like these alleged adults are not only walking around free, but are actually allowed to vote. And remember, these are morons who are somehow still prosperous enough to be able to scrape together the cash to attend a ridiculously overpriced NFL game. Yep, instead of spending hundreds of dollars and battling the traffic and the crowds I spent much of this past Sunday afternoon napping on my couch and reading a book...and I'm a happier man for it.

But hey, fan stupidity isn't always grim. Sometimes, it's even good for a laugh:


  1. Yeah, the country is crazy- you really don't have to pay to see mayhem anymore.

    I got the urge to do some major fall cleaning this weekend and the little town closest to us only has a Dollar Store for that sort of thing. I could drive 15 more miles and get to the environmentally correct store. So I go to the Dollar Store and buy all these cleaning supplies and while I'm there this deranged old man leaves the store with his arms full of stuff he didn't pay for. He was brazen. As brazen as Marie making off with the Puerto Rico spoon in Breaking Bad.

    The clerks went nuts. "This time we'll get him!" One of the women ran out after him. Then I heard "he's trying to run over me! Goddammit! " I run towards the door, but by then she's back and says that he missed. She was unmistakably aroused by this incident. The other clerk says "Did you get his picture?" She holds up her phone and says" I always do". She showed the rather weird Annie Liebovitz style series of photos of this old dude on her phone. Each one in various degree of felonious behavior. I guess he then took off on foot leaving behind his rather surprisingly nice automobile (and large too- I don't know how he missed her).

    And I didn't have to pay anything for this! But I think he may still be at large.

    You are right about the NFL sucking. But Chris Kluwe should be the poster boy for comfortable with his hetero creds.

    And he is a wordsmith. I love him.

  2. I watched my entire season's worth of NFL on Sunday. Almost 30secs. worth. I went something like this.
    SF player on a run toward corner goal line steps/is knocked out near the endzone and the whistle blows. Goal line ref runs in late from behind the play and calls a TD. Of course, it's the last 2 mins of the quarter so "we're gonna get a booth-review of that Jimmy" another few seconds of guys milling about then onto a series of retarded commercials during the 'booth-review' then back to the field to see the call overturned. More milling about. Whatever. Click.
    Season over.